How to Plan a Wedding When You Have No Idea Where to Start
Feeling overwhelmed? You’re not alone. Here’s how to go from “I have no clue” to “I’ve got this.”
So, you’re engaged (yay!) and now it’s time to plan the biggest celebration of your life. You’re picturing the dance floor packed, stunning dress, cocktail in hand, and that feeling of being surrounded by everyone you love. But right now? You have no idea where to start.
Sound familiar?
If you’re in the “Google Docs and late-night Pinterest spirals” stage, here’s your step-by-step guide to planning a wedding without losing your mind.
Talk about what matters most to you both.
Why are you having a wedding, instead of eloping?
Captured by Matthew Ellacott Photography
1. Talk About What Matters Most
Before you dive into venues and budgets, take a moment (maybe a large glass of wine) and talk to your partner about what this day actually means to you. Do you want to spend quality time with your people? Throw the best party of your life? Honour your family traditions?
Knowing what matters most will help guide every decision from here on out, and stop you getting distracted by what Instagram says you should do.
2. Set a Realistic Budget (And Be Honest About the Guest List)
Money stuff? Not the most fun chat, but 100% essential.
Think about how much you’re both happy to spend, whether family is contributing, and what kind of celebration that allows.
In the UK, the average wedding now costs over £30k, but if you’re hoping for a weekend wedding, multiple events, or that dreamy countryside venue? You’re probably looking at £60k+.
It’s also time to get (brutally) honest about the guest list, because more guests = more cost. This is your permission slip to prioritise the people who really matter.
How do you want to feel?
Rather than picking a colour scheme, think about the feeling you want to create.
Captured by Rick Masters Photography.
3. Choose a Vibe, Not a Colour Scheme
Forget picking napkin colours before you know what kind of day you’re planning. Instead, ask yourself: What do I want this wedding to feel like?
Relaxed but elegant? Cosy and rustic? Joyful and a little bit wild?
Once you’ve got a vibe, every choice becomes easier: from your venue to your flowers.
4. Lock In Your Big Three: Venue, Planner & Photographer
The best suppliers get booked up fast, especially venues, photographers, and planners. If your budget allows, working with a wedding planner (hi!) can honestly save you hours of stress and spreadsheet agony.
A good planner will help you:
Find suppliers that match your vibe and budget
Keep your plans on track (and your inbox under control)
Make the day feel like you, not like a wedding factory
Who will make planning easier for you?
Consider who will help and who will hinder your planning progress.
Captured by Matthew Ellacott Photography.
5. Don’t Plan Alone (Or With Everyone)
This is your wedding, not a group project.
Too many opinions can drown out your own voice. So whether it’s a planner, a sibling, or your partner, pick 1–2 people you trust to help you make decisions.
The rest? Let them enjoy the day without needing to be on your planning committee.
6. Remember: Pinterest is Inspiration, Not Instruction
It’s easy to feel like you need to recreate that Tuscan wedding you saw online. But trust me, the most unforgettable weddings are the ones that feel like the couple, not a photoshoot.
Authentic > perfect.
Your inside jokes, your people, your story - that’s what makes it magic.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, you’re not failing.
Wedding planning can feel like a full-time job, and the truth is, it kind of is. But you don’t have to do it alone.
If you’re dreaming of a joyful, meaningful, relaxed wedding that’s full of heart (and probably ends with barefoot dancing and sore cheeks from laughing), I’d love to help.
Want more tips like this?
Check out more of my blogs or follow me on Instagram at @emilyyoungweddings
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The images in this post were captured by the wonderful Matthew Ellacott, an Oxfordshire based photographer, and Rick Masters, a Yorkshire based photographer.
